"I just want my child to have it better than I did." "I want them to have nice things."
Wanting what's best for your child and handing the world to them on a silver platter are two entirely different animals.
Whether we're talking about material items or privileges, children want and need boundaries. They need to understand the value of a buck and understand that they don't always get their own way.
"Remember, parenting has to do with more than the present. You are preparing your child for the future. A person's character is one's destiny. Boundaries are the key to making any relationship work." - Dr. Henry Cloud, Dr. John Townsend, authors of Boundaries with Kids, When to say Yes, and How to say No.
Mom's it's ok to say “no”. You really aren't doing them any favors by caving in all the time. Granted, sometimes it's easier to say no. How many of us have had screaming children in stores. In the midst of their temper tantrum you know if you just concede and let him have that toy, he'll be quiet and the other customers will stop looking at you. Don't do it Mom.
You will send a message that all junior has to do is make a ruckus and you'll say yes. It's ok to say no, Mom. Don't be concerned with what other people think, it's your child and it's your responsibility to train him up in the way he should go.
Fast forward a few years and your pre-teen had plans to go to the skating party. But she didn't bring her grades up, as agreed. You told her that if she didn't, she wasn't going to be allowed to go to the party. Ever experience a rant from an eleven year old girl? It's not pretty. You know she had her heart set on it. The cow tears are flying and it's breaking your heart to have to ground her from going. Maybe she could start her punishment after the party.
Don't do it Mom. Stick to your guns. Remember when your parents had to punish you and Dad would say, "This hurts me more than it does you"? We could never quite understand that. But as a parent, you know how hard it is to say no to your child.
No one said child rearing was a pain-free road. Children can bring you the most joy you've ever experienced – as well as the most pain. Do the right thing. Moms, it's ok to say no.
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